As one wise Litopian recently said to me, ‘Titles SUCK!!’

When I wrote songs, I never had a problem with titles. They would spring up with the lyrics or suggest themselves with the repeated line of a refrain. Likewise, titles for chapters come easily to me. (The debate whether to title a chapter or not, I’ll leave for another day.  But personally, I like a titled chapter, giving a flavour of what’s to come and signposting the route of the story.)

The title of my third novel – which was conceived decades before the first – arrived fully formed and has stayed put so far. The Forgotten Songs of Sarah Sullivan is about a songwriter who has a problem with almost everything in life except songwriting. The title of the second book keeps changing but currently is named after one of Sarah’s songs, Lie to Me Gently. But the first, and most crucial title, is causing me no end of timewasting grief.

I’ve lived with the working title The Superior Position of Hannah Thomas for so long, that to be told by trusted Litopians that it’s off-putting and makes my protagonist sound like a stuck-up bitch was hard to take. People who’ve read the novel seem to like the title. Someone whose opinion I greatly value said it sounded like the sort of thing he might see in Waterstones. But clearly, it’s Marmite. And with none of the few agents I’ve sent it to so far showing any interest, I conceded it was time to let go.

So, what to call it instead?

It must be attention-grabbing, original, true to genre. I mustn’t mislead the reader or misrepresent my work. It mustn’t be boring (as if any of us plan to be). Easy, right?

I made a list of possible alternatives and canvassed opinion…

Happy More or Less

A Tangled Marriage

How to Ruin a Friendship

Normality is Overrated

Hannah’s Lib

The Door Held Ajar

Songs of Desire & Despair

…nobody liked any of them very much.

I took suggestions from Litopians but nothing felt like me.

I thought about titles I love. Here are few of my favourites.

Until I Find You – John Irving

How to be Both – Ali Smith

Theft by Finding – David Sedaris

A Tale for the Time Being – Ruth Ozeki

Take Nothing with You – Patrick Gale

Thatcher Stole My Trousers – Alexei Sayle

The Book of Form and Emptiness – Ruth Ozeki

A Prayer for Owen Meany – John Irving

If You Can’t Live Without Me, Why Aren’t You Dead Yet?! – Cynthia Heimel

(Personally, I’d lose the exclamation mark, but she’s hilarious, and I forgive her.)

Of all of these, the ones that resonate the most are:

A Prayer for Owen Meany

A Tale for the Time Being

I want my novel to be that kind of book; I want it to have that kind of title.

A line from a song kept playing in my head – A Spring Clean for the May Queen – I wanted that so badly for my title. But a lawsuit isn’t the best way to engage with Robert Plant.

Whilst song lyrics are copyrighted, titles aren’t. There are lots of novels that borrow song titles. They have that (sometimes irritating) knack of putting the song in your head when you see them in the bookshop, and as a marketing device, that seems to work. Some titles feel intentionally earwormy like these two examples from Sophie Cousens: Just Haven’t Met You Yet and Is She Really Going Out with Him?  Or Mhairi McFarlane using 80s hits Who’s that Girl? and Don’t You Forget About Me.  Others seem more organic, but Go Tell it On the Mountain (James Baldwin) and This Must Be the Place (Maggie O’Farrell) get in my head and stay there.

I contemplated Everybody Knows this is Nowhere as a title.  The Neil Young song and album feature in my novel. But nobody liked it. And probably not enough people remember the song to get the earworm factor on any grand scale.

I thought about the essence of my novel – a coming-of-age story of a bewildered young woman exploring bisexuality with the encouragement of her male partner. But that’s not all it’s about. It’s about Hannah and Neil’s friendship and the music that connects them.

As with Sarah’s story, it all comes back to songs.

So now I’m calling it Songs for Beginners. It’s a borrowed title, from the 1971 Graham Nash album of the same name. That’s the year the story begins. Hannah loved that album, and it feels appropriate.

It may prove to be nothing more than a placeholder. I might change my mind about it tomorrow.

You might leave a comment telling me why you hate it. So, I’ll instantly ditch it and call it something like Bridging instead, because you’ll tell me all the best titles are only one word. You could be right. (But much as I’m a huge Ian McEwan fan, and Lessons is one of my favourite novels of all time, I disagree with everyone else on the planet about Atonement being the best title ever.)

On the slim chance my book ever sees daylight in the real world, a publisher may choose an entirely different title. They might want to call it The Superior Position of Hannah Thomas after all, though I doubt it.

What I’ve learned in all of this, is that there’s no point being precious about a title. Something I might think genius could be lost on the majority of readers. As long as I find a title I don’t hate, I’ll be happy more or less.

So, until I find you, your name is Songs for Beginners, and that will do for starters.

Full members of Litopia can take the Writing Killer Titles seminar here.

Please comment below about titles: my titles, your titles, everybody else’s brilliant titles, and why they cause so much bother.