A Christmas Reflection

If you read my Christmas Snippets post, you’ll be aware that I suffered a psychotic episode in 2019. This was followed by a long period of anxiety and depression. In 2020, my mind couldn’t take any more. It shut down, and I left my family home. My boys were just four and seven. Things came to a head at the start of 2022, when I hit rock bottom. After I was discharged from hospital, I returned home. And with the love and support of my family, I found myself again.
2019
A year of scars
A year of grief
A year of wondering
If Iâll ever be me
A year of hurt
A world of pain
A time of struggle
No hope of gain
2020
A year of escape
A time to avoid
Thoughts of suffering
The endless void
A year of blankness
An empty home
No fear of reality
Iâm all alone
2021
A year of confusion
Iâm here then Iâm not
The pain flared
Then I forgot
A year of fantasy
Donât face the truth
Time to unsee
The heart-breaking proof
2022
It starts with an ending
An attempt, at least
Tormented by life
Desperate for release
Then a year of love
A year to recover
A regaining of hope
A goal to discover
2023
A year to dream
Of words on the page
Of realisation
It was just a stage
And stages pass
The good, the bad
Time to move on
To be thankful, to be glad
2024
A year of change
A new direction
Life goes on
A Christmas reflection
Tree decorated with my boys, aged 8 and 11, December 2024.
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